CRACK Ho Edition
#1



With thanks (and apologies) to Kari Wuhrer Online.

Image selected by HurriKain.






SL4ever•Hurry up, white van! Step on the gas!!!!
HurriKain•When Kari decided to make her next album, she wanted to spread the funk, though her producer thought she meant something else.
DieselMickeyDolenz•"And for my next trick, watch what I can do with this lead pipe!"
MissingSliderRyan•In order for Kari to get her bag of nickels... er... residuals, Peck wanted her to do this.
HurriKain•This being her first time riding a bike, Kari could only ask herself, "Where's the shaft?"
Informant•"Hey, this is actually very similar to my Sliders audition, only there wasn't a bike there! Wait a minute... yes there was."
DieselMickeyDolenz•Kari Wuhrer, proving once again that bicycles should never be equipped with stirrups.
Blinker•"Wheeeee! I'm riding a bisexual!"
MissingSliderRyan•Promo for Nubile Nymphos Summer Vacation: Bicycling Though Europe.
HurriKain•This picture was taken on the set of the "Your Octopus" video shoot rehearsal where Kari was supposed to ride a bike through a field of flowers... Unfortunately, she got lost, ran over a pothole, and was knocked backwards, crashing headfirst into the pavement. Luckily, nothing was damaged...
DieselMickeyDolenz•Director: CUT! Dammit Kari, when the cops shout "Spread 'em" they're talking to the BAD GUYS!
SL4ever•When asked who taught her to ride a bike this way, Kari would only say "A nicely dressed Greek man."
HurriKain•"I'm a bread lady! My doctor said I have a yeast infection! Who wants some bread!"
Jenneration_X•Talk about being the village bicycle... everyone's had a ride!
DieselMickeyDolenz•Kari "Meals on Wheels" Wuhrer.
HurriKain•Here we see Kari's commercial for "Mesmerize Douche: New Potpourri Scent"...
MissingSliderRyan•She wanted the Guinness entry for the largest object able to fit into the human body.
ColinMallory•The Annual Kari Wuhrer Pride Parade attracts absolutely no attention from bystanders.
SL4ever•"That was a dirty trick to play, taking my seat off like that! No, that's okay... as you can see, I kinda like it!"
HurriKain•Kari: Letting her "flower" bloom.
TheIrrelevantPoster•LOS ANGELES (TIP) - Actress Kari Wuhrer gave up her career in acting today to join the L.A.P.D. as a bike cop. Seen here, she demonstrates to her fellow officers how she can take down a suspect from 50 yards merely by opening her legs and releasing a pungent, paralyzing stench.
MissingSliderRyan•Poster Child for Bicycle Fetishes Anonymous.
SL4ever•...and in local news, a cameraman lost his life today in a tragic biking accident. Here is the last picture he managed to squeeze off before the collision...
HurriKain•Kari was riding her bike to her trailer when one of the truckers blasted the song "Back That Ass Up!" from his radio.
DieselMickeyDolenz•Her dream in life is to find a gynecologist with a drive-thru window.
SL4ever•"I love to feel the wind in my hair!"


Back to Episode ListBack to Gate Haven