As he approached the three people (who seemed now to be guarding the gateway to Sliders) Murphy realized that they had nametags on their chests. The broad shouldered man in the crimson tunic and holding a wicked looking knife as if it were a prized teddy bear was named OzSlider. The second man, with long flowing blonde hair and a mischievous grin, held a blast gun that looked like it could be rearranged and fashioned into something else. His name was CoolSlider. The third person was a woman. Tall, thin, with long blonde hair and sparkling eyes … Murphy stared a little too long. She caressed her holstered pulse pistol. "What are you looking at?"

Murphy saw that her name was Slider_Sarah but quickly moved his eyes away lest she think he was staring at her breasts. "What is this place?" He asked. "How did I get here? Everything is so crazy here!"

"Fag." CoolSlider snapped good-naturedly.

"What?" Murphy asked, puzzled.

"Do I have to repeat myself?" CoolSlider returned.

"Um, no."

The round dining table was massive. It had to be since emissaries from three different boards were in attendance, with the necessary six feet in between each party. With one exception, the three groups huddled together in their thirds of the table as if they didn't completely trust the other two groups.

They made small talk during the elaborate twelve course meal, barking orders to their personal service drones and commenting at large about the quality of the roast duck, Chicken Kiev, lobster, and other courses. But no one mentioned their purpose. Not until the last course had been cleared and their claret glasses were full and the last service drone was gone from the secret meeting room.

The one exception, the one person who had been sitting by himself, set aside his crystal glass filled with a dark, oily liquid and regarded the attending emissaries from beneath a brown hood that concealed his features. His brown robe was loose enough that even the shape of his body was not clear. His voice was deep and extremely confident. "I suppose you wonder why I have summoned you."

One of the leaders of the Farscape board, Stevepalmer, replied first. "You could say that. Why the secrecy?"

One of the First Wave spokespeople, Jesikangel, chimed in. "Yes, what is this about? We're very busy. We don't have time for some hooded >:-# wasting our time."

Ms_Boyd, one of The Invisible Man leaders, sighed. "Can we keep the language clean, please? There was enough cussing in the Invisible Man premiere to last me a lifetime."

Executive, another First Wave emissary, muttered another cuss word just loud enough for her to hear.

The Summoner tapped his glass with one long, dark nail. It made a nasty, ominous sound. Everyone returned their attention to him. "There is a blight in the Dominion." He stated as if he had not been interrupted. "I have summoned you to remove it. None of you alone could accomplish this task. Even two of you would have trouble. But your combined forces will overwhelm this blight and remove it.

"I am speaking, of course, of the Sliders Board. Their show has been canceled for over a year, and yet they remain the largest board in the history of the Dominion. Their rate of posting rivals new shows and dwarfs several of them. They churn out tens of thousands of words of fan fiction a week. They are a drain on precious Dominion resources in a time when their function and very need for existence has passed. You three will invade, execute all remaining denizens of their land, and return that extensive patch of memory to the Dominion."

Stevepalmer seemed amused. "And if we refuse? Our shows are still in production, you can't touch us. You need our boards to maintain interest and thus ratings."

A hideous grin appeared within the hood. "Did you see what we did to Sliders during the two seasons we controlled its production? Who wants a series ending cliffhanger? We have half a dozen more fishbowls in storage. Anyone want to see how we write out one of your beloved characters?"

The emissaries gasped in horror. They conferred among themselves and then voted.

The vote was not much of a surprise. Not even the peacenuts in attendance, like Farscaper Haleypop, could really hope to stop what was about to happen.

Someone named TemporalFlux was sitting at a park bench in the middle of the courtyard, typing hurridly on a laptop with one hand while holding a Dagwoodlike sandwich in the other. A glass of Gillian's Red was beside the laptop.

HunterD_Raven and Stoker_chick were conversing quietly near an artificial lake.

A larger group of people giggled and joked together over to the left. Murphy caught some of their names: Mychand, Tigs, MTwain, SouthernSlider, Chaser9, and QBall79.

Someone was barbecuing. It smelled delicious so Murphy headed that direction. The cook was SL4ever. With him were HurriKain, SweetOne, and dellyone.

"Hello." HurriKain commented in a friendly tone. "A visitor I see. You haven't signed up yet."

"I don't even know where I am." Murphy replied miserably. "Or how I got here."

SL4ever began turning over the juicy hamburgers, they sizzled and popped delightfully. "That is not an uncommon statement."

"Are you lost?" SweetOne asked helpfully.

"I guess I must be."

"Why don't you look for yourself in the last place you saw yourself? That's what I always do." SL4ever commented helpfully.

"You're insane." Murphy stated without surprise.

SL4ever turned his attention to the second rack of the grill, where hot dogs burned to perfection. "That is another common statement."

MTwain joined them from the other group. She slapped SL4ever's back gently. "Come ON, what's taking you so long?"

As SL4ever went into a longwinded explanation about how cooking genius could not be rushed, Murphy turned away.

DieselMickeyDolenz was talking heatedly with another group of people, stabbing a printout with one finger. The other three people were Brand_S, SpaceTime, and RMScream. All four of them seemed more heavily armed the any of the other residents.

"I'm telling you, there is something suspicious here. The number of posts on those three boards have dropped 24% in the past two days. Something is up." DieselMickeyDolenz insisted.

"It doesn't have anything to do with us," Brand_S scoffed.

"Even if it does, anyone would have to be a retarded chimp to try and >:-# with us." SpaceTime added. "We flame each other back to the stone age for SPORT, what do you think we would do to someone who tried to come in here and take what is ours? We have more flamers per capita than Lebanon."

RMScream snorted. "And let's not forget the malevolent rage all Sliders fans carry within their dark hearts because of how many times we've been kicked around by the show."

"What about the reports of 'campers' massing at the North, West, and East gates?" DieselMickeyDolenz wanted to know. "And where else would THREE boards be attacking?"

SpaceTime twisted his pencil thin mustache with two fingers. His other hand lightly tapped his .88 Magnum. "All right. We'll each take a gate. Just talk to the guards and check the movement records. I'd be interested to know how many visitors we've had from the other boards in the past couple days."

They broke company and headed in opposite directions as Murphy watched in confusion.

Someone named ThomasMalthus was writing in a notebook computer so Murphy decided to make another attempt at understanding. "What kind of place is this?"

ThomasMalthus glanced up. "The best kind, chum."

"Why is everyone armed? Do you fight with each other a lot?"

ThomasMalthus found that very amusing and laughed out loud. "All the time! But we save our biggest ire for Peckinballs and other annoying people involved with the show."

Murphy fell into a bench and sagged his shoulders. "I don't understand any of this."

"Just go with it baby," ThomasMalthus advised. "Comprehension is overrated."

"Hey Slidemania." Brand_S said casually, fingering his holstered blastgun. "Tell me something. This is the closest gate to Farscape. How many of them have visited in the past two days?"

The other man toggled a switch on his board and entered in the query. "45 different people."

"Christ almighty! How does that compare to the previous two days?"

"The previous two days we only had 2 people visit!" Slidemania sounded concerned. "I thought there was an increase, but I had no idea ..." he entered another search. "In the previous MONTH we haven't had 45 different people visit!"

Brand_S glanced back at the four Farscapers who had just passed him. They were lingering at the water fountain twenty feet away. They seemed to be discussing which posts to visit and didn't seem interested in this conversation. Still, he spoke in a softer voice. "How many of them are still inside?"

More key punches. "23." The word was stiff.

Brand_S touched his nametag. "SpaceTime, come in."

"SpaceTime here."

"I think DMD is onto something. What does it look like with you?"

"Nothing unusual here at the South Gate. I was just trading snaps with CoolSlider."

The two new Scapers were close enough to read their tags now. Brand_S didn't turn but from the corner of his eye he saw the four Scapers behind him wandering casually back towards the Gate. He couldn't be sure but he thought they were pulling things from their pockets. Brand_S' left hand was in his pocket. His questing fingers found his stiletto handle and tightened around it. His right hand seemed to be resting on his belt right above his pistol.

"Prepare to lock down the Gate." He hissed without moving his lips.

TIP was centering himself in the middle of the Gate to see the two newcomers' papers. Slidemania leaned forward to cover what his left hand was typing. The_Seer was leaning against the wall and had his hands clasped lightly behind his back, but he was slowly pulled a Bowie knife from a holster at the small of his back.

Brand_S could sense the four right behind him. It would be unnatural not to turn now, so he turned as if to make small talk.

The first one, Stevepalmer, smiled easily. "Hi there. I like your show."

"I guess that's why you're visiting." Brand_S replied easily. His thumb was on the release button of his pocketed stiletto.

One of the other four, Greenie, added, "I was sorry to hear it was cancelled."

"So were we."

Behind him, he could hear TIP ask the two newcomers for their papers. "Here's a TIP for you, have them out next time and you'll make it through faster." He added.

"Have you ever seen Farscape?" A third member of the party already inside, Shipscat asked.

The two people at the Gate identified themselves as KaraS and Qarc.

When Brand_S turned his head slightly to reply to Shipscat he saw Stevepalmer lunge for him. Brand_S darted backwards and to his left, his right handle pulling out his pistol and his left whipping out the stiletto.

Shipscat and Greenie charged him. Stevepalmer moved past Brand_S and buried a silver hatchet in Slidemania's head. It was too late, the security Gate began hurtling down. KaraS and Qarc jumped past TIP before they were trapped outside. The Gate slammed closed.

Brand_S knocked Greenie to her feet with the barrel of his blast gun, twisted to avoid Shipscat's knife thrust, and then shoved his stiletto handle against Shipscat's neck.

Shipscat grinned. "What is that? A pencil? Am I supposed to be afraid of a pencil against my neck?"

"Nope," the other poster responded, then depressed the handle. The tip of the blade emerged from the other side of Shipscat's neck, bringing with it a spray of blood. "Too bad this isn't a pencil."

The_Seer was wrestling with Stevepalmer, the two of them slamming each other around and against the Gate console. The fourth person who had already been inside, Breige, had an asp in one hand and moved in to help their leader.

TIP was menacing KaraS and Qarc with his laser pistol. "Here's a TIP for you, never >:-# with TIP."

"See?" KaraS said to Qarc. "I told you there were times you would need a gun."

"I'd love to have a gun now," Qarc moaned.

Brand_S and Greenie were wrestling for control of his gun. She kneed him in the crotch, then clawed the skin off his gun hand but still he retained control.

"I'd love to play with you some more," Stevepalmer teased The_Seer, "but I have more important things to do." He faked with his right and followed with an uppercut when The_Seer overprotected himself. Before the Slider fan could recover, Stevepalmer had the muzzle of a blastgun pressed against his mouth. "Checkmate."

The sound of the shot, and the resultant skull fragments hitting the corridor wall, distracted TIP. He moved his pistol towards the sounds. KaraS and Qarc charged him and impaled him with their daggers before he could react.

"Here's a TIP for you," Qarc said, twisting the knife, "never take your eyes off a man with a knife." They dropped TIP to the ground, where he twitched.

Brand_S was wiping the blood off the muzzle of his gun. He'd finally brought it to bear on Greenie's tummy and finished the fight. He glanced up and saw Stevepalmer covering him with his own weapon. "Give me the code to open the security Gate."

">:-# you," Brand_S spat.

Stevepalmer grinned. "I don't think you understand your situation. I can take a long time incinerating you with this. Or I can make it quick. Your choice."

"There's a third choice." Brand_S raised his pistol.

Stevepalmer had no choice but to shoot him. One half of Brand_S hit the wall five feet away, the other half went skittering twenty feet towards the center of the Sliders community.

"Try a pulse gun, boss." Breige suggested. "There is something left of someone who gets hit with that."

TIP, not dead yet, aimed his pistol with bleary eyes. He pressed the trigger once. "Here's a TIP for you," he muttered, "never turn your back on a man with a gun."

Qarc fell to his knees, vomiting blood. "I knew there was a reason I hated guns." He gasped before he died.

TIP's arm dropped as he joined him in oblivion.

Stevepalmer rubbed his hands together. "Well, that could have gone better! But we're inside. Let's go help another Gate!"

Someone called out "INVASION!" and several people were shouting and trying to organize.

Murphy noticed a tall dangerous looking man loading a 9mm automatic. He had a mace hanging from a cord around his neck. His tag read "BritSlider."

"I suppose it's time for me to ask yet again what is going on." Murphy murmured.

Blinker was next to BritSlider charging his wrist lasers. He had a Borg implant in his eye which apparently controlled his rocket backpack because where his head turned the rockets tracked. He said, "three of our Gates have reported attack. Apparently the other boards are attacking us."

Murphy took in how many Sliders fans were in the courtyard, all of whom had an intimidating array of weapons. "I almost feel sorry for them."

Across the courtyard, capaqu, Sabre_Edge, HunterD_Raven, Stoker_chick, and TemporalFlux were discussing what to do with three First Wave visitors.

"We don't know anything about this." Jesikangel argued. "We're just innocent visitors. We heard there was a Family Feud spoof here and we wanted to see it."

"Yeah!" AerynFoster and RobertLeeds chimed in. "You can search us, but we are unarmed!"

HunterD_Raven gestured with a sword. "Put them in the Slide-It-Yourself room. That'll be punishment enough."

"We've lost contact with the North Gate." SL4ever was saying nearby. "Let's go down that corridor and back them up. If they've been overwhelmed, the invaders will have to make it through us to get to the rest of the community."

"Agreed." MTwain said, taking the safety off her blast rifle. SweetOne, dellyone, ThomasMalthus, and Recall317 went with him. At the same time, Mychand, Tigs, SouthernSlider, Chaser9, and QBall79 were going down the West Gate corridor. And Jenneration_X, Informant, Grizzlor, and TheUnstuckSlider were sneaking down the East Gate.

The rest of the remaining Sliders Fans were fanning out in pairs to search for invaders who had already infiltrated in the past two days.

Slixx2 and eZeSlider ran into trouble first. They discovered three Invisible Man visitors hiding in a bathroom. QS9300project and WorkerCaste drowned Slixx2 in a toilet while FawkesFox wrestled with eZeSlider. eZeSlider finally shoved his opponent's head in a urinal and held it there with one firm hand until he could disembowel him with a plunger. Then eZeSlider recovered his pulse gun and destroyed the other two Invisible Men before they could emerge from the toilet stall. eZeSlider flushed the urinal, checked his hair in the mirror, and went looking for more invaders.

Callie21V and stuslide were the next to encounter visitors. Two Scapers, queeneve and Giggling_Star, were wiring the kitchen with explosives. "Hold it right there! Put the plastic explosives down!" Callie21V ordered, holding her blast gun with two steady hands. queeneve sighed and set her cargo on the kitchen counter. "I told you we should have had someone at the door to this room." She snapped to her partner.

Giggling_Star giggled. "Yep. You sure did."

The two Sliders fans felt cold steel against their necks. "Now you two drop YOUR >:-#." Someone ordered coldly from behind them.

"Oppsie." queeneve snickered. "I guess my plan to have someone in the room across the hall was better after all!"

Callie21V and stuslide lowered their weapons and tossed them to the ground.

The person behind them shoved them further into the kitchen and walked over in front of them. His name tag read StevieSun. "Sliders sucked anyway." He said and shot stuslide in the head.

He gasped. "Did you hear that?" He said to his two partners behind him. "The sound of his skull fragments hitting the wall, it sounded like Chopsticks! That is some wacked out >:-#!"

queeneve scoffed. "Bull."

"It DID! Tell her, Callie21V."

"Eat me." Callie21V replied.

queeneve laughed. "You're insane. Lemme hear it again."

"Listen this time," StevieSun retorted and blew Callie21V's head off.

"Nah, man." queeneve countered. "It sounded like Fur Elise maybe, but no way that was Chopsticks."

StevieSun shrugged. "Whatever. I'll be across the hall if you need me."

When he reached the doorway he suddenly screamed. A sword blossomed from his back as if he were a sword tree. The sword disappeared back into his body and out of his stomach, from which it had come. A spray of his blood hit the wall and began running down slowly like cold syrup.

"Since we're getting all artistic and >:-#," HunterD_Raven said from the hallway, "I'll say that his blood on the wall looks rather like a Picasso. What do you think?"

queeneve trained her pistol on the doorway. "I say how about you come in and we'll discuss it over a cappuccino. You have a nice machine here. Much better than the coffee pot at my board."

In the hallway, HunterD_Raven said "I think I'll take a raincheck. But have a Bitchslap on us." He nodded to HurriKain. The other man grinned as he waggled his remote control. The BitchSlapper2000's eyes lit up with baneful glee. It clenched its one huge hand then released, as if testing its slapping power. With thudding steps it entered the kitchen.

HunterD_Raven and HurriKain heard pulse guns firing, thundering steps, and then a horrible slapping sound. There was a sound like a bag of wet meat being dropped from two stories up, then the rattling of the oven grill. Then the sound of the oven door being slammed closed.

HunterD_Raven raised his eyes. "Did he slap someone INTO the oven? Ouuuuuuuch."

"I find it best to set it at 400 if you don't preheat!" HurriKain called out helpfully.

There was more pulse gun firing, then a lot of pans being thrown around, then silence. But not a second slap. HurriKain groaned. "I guess one of us'll have to look." He peeked around the corner. The BitchSlapper2000 was standing in front of the dumbwaiter, fuming. He could see the cable move as the dumbwaiter lowered. HurriKain leaped around the corner and closed the distance to the dumbwaiter. He shoved his Benelli M1 tactical 12 gauge shotgun into the shaft and sent a hail of pellets after whoever was escaping. But even as he fired he knew he was too late because the cables had stopped moving right before he reached the shaft. A glance down confirmed, whoever had escaped was not in the dumbwaiter.

HunterD_Raven opened the oven door. "OUCH. Giggling_Star got her head slapped down through her >:-#! It's between her legs! :-O "

"AND slapped into the oven." HurriKain gushed. "Nice one, BitchSlapper! Come on, Hunter. Let's disengage these explosives."

"Is all this violence really necessary?" Murphy wanted to know.

"Any social interaction eventually involves violence." BritSlider replied. "Be it emotional violence, physical, verbal, financial, or spiritual. Conflict is the inevitable result of interaction."

"Yes, but that's isn't true of EVERY social interaction!!" Murphy argued. "We aren't violent with our lovers! Not everyone is, anyway."

"Maybe not physically," Blinker countered, kicking open closet doors with his wrist lasers trained at them. "But there is some form of attempted dominance going on. Forcing them to go to a movie just because you want to see it. That is violence."

"Only if it were an Adam Sandler movie. That would be heinous." Murphy agreed partially.

"Copping an attitude is violence." BritSlider added. "Obviously cussing them out, calling names ... there is a lot more violence than just physical. It is unavoidable."

"Okay, lover was a bad example. But what about your mother! You can't tell me everyone is violent with their mothers!" Murphy said smugly.

"So when you were 12 or 13 you never cried out to mother to stop criticizing you?" BritSlider asked pointedly as he poked under the beds with his mace. "You never stormed out of the house with a rude comment because she wanted you home by 11? Not even once?"

"She would have tanned my hide if I was ever rude to her!" Murphy countered with a shiver at the thought.

Blinker grinned at BritSlider. "Oh, no violence in that relationship, is there?"

Blinker opened another closet to reveal Two Invisible Man fans. They charged out screaming from the closet, waving scimitars. Their tags read duntulm and LaRin.

"You're just going to twist around everything I say, aren't you?" Murphy complained.

Blinker ducked a scimitar, snatched duntulm's arm, and spun the invader around and against the wall. "No, we're not. It's just that we're right. Violence is a part of life. It is a part of the human experience. It should be embraced."

BritSlider was a second too slow and took the edge of LaRin's scimitar in his left arm. He countered by caving in LaRin's head with his mace. "Besides, you have to take into account that we're Sliders fans. We have been dogged out so much …" he hammered LaRin again, knocking the standing corpse off its feet. "… that we all carry within ourselves a barely suppressed psychotic rage that the fans of all other shows have no understanding of." BritSlider finished saying as he began jumping up and down on the corpse, the heels of his metal boots obliterating the remains.

"Just because violence is common doesn't mean it is the only answer." duntulm argued as he tried to impale Blinker. "Or that violence is in any way amusing."

Blinker backed far enough away to activate his wrist lasers. "But just because there might be other answers doesn't mean they are any better." He scowled at duntulm. "Besides, why are you talking when you're supposed to be dying like a good boy?" He shredded duntulm by crisscrossing his wrists back and fourth three times. Then his eyes widened. ">:-#! I shouldn't have done that!"

Murphy's tone was smug. "Starting to see my way, eh? It's about time!"

"No. I just realized that is MY closet!" Blinker growled. "I should have gotten him farther away before I turned him inside out! >:-#!! I only have a small clothing insurance policy! Not even enough to cover my four cheapest tunics!"

"Let's do a deal!" Executive called out. "We'll allow you free passage out the gate and away from here. All we want is your real estate, we could give a >:-# about you six!"

"I wouldn't trust you if you were last weasel in the Dominion!" Recall317 returned.

"You can trust me," MaryFX called out. "I wouldn't lie to you. We really need to get in, so we'll make a one time exception and allow six Sliders fans to escape. In the big picture, that is not that important."

Recall317 glanced at the others. "I think they're telling the truth. But I say they can take their offer and stuff it. What do you guys think?"

"Right up the tailpipe," dellyone replied.

MTwain called out, "sorry, I guess you're just going to have to stuff that offer up your butts!"

Down the corridor, Executive pulled out two smoke grenades. "That's it, I've had it with them. Let's just charge them."

MaryFX grabbed his arm. "Listen, I know this is personal with you-."

Executive cut her off. "LISTEN! THEY MADE ME AN OUTCAST!!! THEY RAN ME OFF THEIR LITTLE BOARD!!! I HATE EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM!! WE'RE GOING TO CHARGE THEM NOW!!!!!"

With that he activated the grenades and tossed them down the corridor. When they exploded in billows of smoke he called out "CHARGE!!"

Recall317 had the low shot as he was laying on the floor at the corner. MTwain had the middle shot, crouching over Recall317. Sweetone had the high shot, standing and leaning around MTwain. The three of them opened fire, their laser beams, blast waves, and pulse charges tearing into the smoke. They heard screams and the sounds of falling bodies. Returning fire, most of it wildly off the mark, emerged from the smoke.

One blast wave was on the mark and SweetOne's arm vanished. She called out and stumbled into the middle of the corridor. Two pulse charges hit her simultaneously and the conflicting energies tore her apart. ThomasMalthus took her place and almost immediately took a head shot. He fell to the floor, his Desert Eagle sliding away to rebound off the far wall. SL4ever took his place, and their combined firepower managed to beat back the charging invaders.

MaryFX was livid. "We just lost ten good people! We have combined leadership, you >:-#ing moron!"

Executive scowled. "You can't have combined leadership, only one person can lead."

MaryFX nodded. "You're right." She lifted her blast gun and gutshot him. "And I'm taking over sole command." She finished him off with a headshot.

SL4ever wiped the smoke from his eyes. "It looks like they've pulled back." He backed away from the corner but didn't relax yet. "Delly, we just lost two people, why don't you go get a couple. I think with six people we can hold them off forever."

"They couldn't even get close enough with the smoke helping them." Recall317 scoffed, watching the air circulators remove the clouds.

"Delly?" SL4ever said and started to turn. He stopped his motion when he felt the blast gun barrel in his ear.

"Drop it." Someone ordered.

MTwain heard that and wheeled with her laser gun. A pulse beam emerged from beside whoever had SL4ever and cut her down before she could fire. Recall317 rolled over and was also shot before he could bring his weapon to bear.

SL4ever dropped his weapon. He was shoved against the wall, next to dellyone who was also under guard.

Their captors were Scapers. The one with the blast gun was named Stevepalmer. He called out, "this is Stevepalmer, we have them! Come on out! Security code Alpha 267!"

They heard a jubilant cheer and the sound of many boots on the metal corridor floor.

The remaining First Wave invaders, MaryFX, sisyphus417, Classiliz, true5, DrkAngel_113, Caed, redvenus, paranoid_jess, RAVENNATIONHQ, ElHombreX, Mahaloth, Fantasie224, and WSmith emerged from the still smokey corridor.

"Contact my group. We didn't secure out Gate, but they can circle around and use this one now." Stevepalmer said to MaryFX.

SL4ever glanced at dellyone, but there was nothing they could do. Although Stevepalmer was talking, the other two Scapers, KaraS and Breige, had their complete attention on the prisoners.

"What about those two?" MaryFX wanted to know.

"You guys go on. I'll take care of this filth and then wait for the rest of my people." Stevepalmer replied.

The First Wavers departed.

Stevepalmer removed a flask from his tunic. "Want a drink?" He asked SL4ever.

"No thanks."

"You are wise to refuse," he noted conversationally as he unscrewed the cap. "I am reminded of a little ditty I heard as a child. Something tells me you heard it as well, because I saw your little quiz last week. You made full use of this little ditty in one of your answers." He nodded to KaraS. She pressed her pulse gun into dellyone's temple to prevent interference. Breige got behind SL4ver and got him in a headlock. He jerked his prisoner's head back to force open the mouth.

"But making it even more appropriate is how much you talk about food and consuming things in general." Stevepalmer added. His mimicked a child's voice as he tossed aside the flask cap and advanced on the prisoner.

"Little Mary took a drink,
but now she will drink no more,
For what she thought was H2O
Was really H2SO4!"

With that Stevepalmer grabbed SL4ever's mouth and poured in the contents of the flask. Breige shoved his prisoner forward. Holes appeared in SL4ever's throat, chest and stomach as the acid ate through the flesh. Boiling blood and dissolving skin spilled out. SL4ever collapsed and was still.

Stevepalmer tossed aside the flask and walked past the others.

"What about her?" Breige wanted to know.

"Don't be in such a hurry, we have to wait for our people anyway." Stevepalmer replied. He was opening doors to the outer apartments that lined this corridor. In the old days, before Sliders was canceled, this domain had contained more people and these apartments had been necessary. Their leader kept peeking in rooms, cussing, and going to the next one.

"What the hell are you looking for?" KaraS snapped.

"Ah!" Stevepalmer said in the way of a reply. He went into the room and soon they could hear running water. KaraS and Breige exchanged a puzzled look. That look changed to understanding when he emerged with a fishbowl filled with water.

"Oh," Breige gushed. "THAT'S what we're going to do with her!"

TemporalFlux overturned his picnic table and fired over it. magicstorm and Charmed07 took positions in the balcony overlooking the courtyard and fired on the invaders. capaqu, and Sabre_Edge were guarding the accumulated prisoners on the other side of the courtyard. They dived behind the dumpsters nearby and opened fire. Everyone else was either at the Gates or hunting for more infiltraters.

The invaders fanned out as they emerged from the corridor. paranoid_jess, Wsmith, and Classiliz died as they fought for the cover. The rest made it clean or with minor flesh wounds.

TemporalFlux's picnic table was being shredded. He snaked an arm around to snatch up his laptop and then belly crawled towards the edge of the courtyard. He took a shot in the leg but made it to a side corridor. RMScream was there, charging a blast rifle. "I thought you'd gone to investigate the North Gate, where these bastards just came from."

RMScream nodded. "I did. I got jumped by a First Wave infiltrater before I could make it there. I dispatched him and then chased his buddy all the way to the Laundromat before getting him. I was coming back to the courtyard when all hell just broke lose."

TemporalFlux wrapped his leg with a towel. "We can't hold the courtyard with that many of them and probably more coming. We were too spread out, having to guard four Gates."

RMScream agreed. "We're going to have to go guerrilla. We'll last a lot longer that way. They still don't know who they are >:-#ing with."

They separated, each finding the first of what they hoped were many ambush points.

The Farscapers began streaming in from the North corridor. Stevepalmer began organizing them for the final phase of the operation.

Breige was one of the last to emerge. He was carrying the loaded down fishbowl, laughing and making jokes about it. "Look! It's Wade! She has POWERS! She can open doorways! Ha ha ha ha ha!"

Most of the invaders smiled politely and then ignored him.

Breige, holding the fishbowl at chest level, wandered past some smaller side corridors, still giggling. "Look!" Breige exclaimed again, squeezing the head in a fishbowl to his chest. "It's Wade!"

As he passed another side corridor there was a wet WHACK sound, followed by a splashing sound. Suddenly the headless body was holding a fishbowl containing two heads.

"Look!" Stoker_chick exclaimed from the dark corridor entrance behind him, her blood splattered sword held above her head. "Wade has a boyfriend!"

The body fell forward on top of the fishbowl with a loud crashing sound. Before anyone could reach the corridor, Stoker_chick was long gone.

Stevepalmer grimaced and ordered his people to commence their searches. Then he walked towards the reactor room to see how the new floors in front of the four doors were coming along.

"This is all just pointless, random violence." Murphy complained. "These people don't have to die!"

"We're all going to die," darkslider stated calmly. "It is just a matter of timing. Would you rather die of old age, dribbling in your oatmeal, or die fighting for something you believe in?"

"I'd rather die in my sleep at the age of 123," Murphy said without hesitation.

"And those last 43 years or so of your life you'll have the mental capacity of a donut, you'll be wetting yourself, your joints will be swollen to the size of bowling balls, your prostate will be long gone, and anything you eat beside a grapefruit and bran flakes will bind you up tighter than superglue." darkslider said with amusement. "Give me a good old fashioned knife in the belly. Preferably after I've prevented five or ten invaders from having to worry about the horrors of old age."

"Once I've gotten too old for largers you might as well stick a knife in my belly," BritSlider added.

"As Carlin once said," Blinker put in, "if everything that has ever lived before us has died, and everything that is alive right now will die, what is so bad about death? Even bad taste dies if you wait long enough."

Murphy shook his head. "There is something wrong with your arguments, but I'm not smart enough to figure out exactly what it is."

Blinker nodded towards the door. "Let's move. We have some adult diaper sales to diminish. If we have anything to say about it, none of these invaders will be buying them in the future."

They encountered HurriKain, BitchSlapper2000, and HunterD_Raven setting up an ambush. "Anyone comes in this arcade and they're going to regret it."

"I think I hear someone now," SpaceTime advised. "Hiding places, all!"

From one doorway Stevepalmer, KaraS, Haleypop, twich, and jedikatie came in low. From the other doorway some First Wavers, Jesikangel, AerynFoster RobertLeeds and coop451 crawled in.

"I thought I heard someone in here, everyone on guard!" Stevepalmer called out.

"I can smell Sliders fans in here!" Jesikangel returned. "They have that odor of quiet desperation to them."

twich noticed the game he was hiding behind. "This is an odd looking game! It is mostly hand."

BitchSlapper2000 backhanded him. The Scaper landed headfirst in a pinball machine; he had been slapped so hard that his head was stuck in the ball return. Gunfire erupted from under and around machines.

RobertLeeds and coop451 were cut down by the crossfire immediately. KaraS got OzSlider with two well placed blasts and then dived behind a skiing game.

AerynFoster leaned out far enough to destroy the BitchSlapper2000 but was too exposed to not be vaporized by HurriKain and HunterD_Raven.

That left Jesikangel by herself on her side. While Slider_Sarah kept her attention on one side, SpaceTime sneaked around from behind and suddenly leaped on her.

KaraS leaped from the skiing game to a Star Wars game, surprising CoolSlider. They fell on each other.

Haleypop, and jedikatie advanced, keeping the games between them and HunterD_Raven. He set his blast gun down and drew his two swords. When they had flanked his game, he whirled around to his right and filleted Haleypop. As she fell to the floor in various pieces she protested "But I'm a peacemaker at heart!"

HunterD_Raven glanced at her exposed heart. "Doesn't look too peaceful to me."

jedikatie charged from around the side. She had a light saber. When HunterD_Raven tried to parry her energy blade sliced through his sword as it if were made of warm butter. "What kind of moron takes a sword to a light saber fight?" jedikatie sneered.

HunterD_Raven tossed aside his useless blades and ducked down and under another pinball machine.

"What do you have for me now? A water pistol?" jedikatie wanted to know as she advanced.

A shower of flame emerged from under the pinball machine, consuming the Scaper from her thighs down.

"Close." HunterD_Raven replied. "Same concept, anyway."

jedikatie fell to the floor, her light saber powered down and slid across the floor. HunterD_Raven finished her off with another blast and set aside the almost empty flame thrower. He rolled out and snatched up the light saber. "I'll take THAT, thank you very much."

CoolSlider was stuffing KaraS into the SkeeBall's 50 point hole when he felt a blast gun caress his neck. "Pull her back out." Stevepalmer ordered coldly.

"You must think I'm Larry Lunchmeat." CoolSlider shot back. "If I release my deathgrip on her, you'll just shoot me. So you might as well shoot me now so I can take her with me."

"I give you my word as a gentleman. Release her and I'll let you and your friends leave peacefully. I can afford to because we have you outnumbered 5-1." Stevepalmer negotiated. "Make a decision quick! I'm sure you can hear the reinforcements coming down the hallway!"

They could all hear the clatter of at least a dozen pairs of boots approaching.

"If you're lying my ghost will haunt your >:-#." CoolSlider growled, pulled KaraS back out, and released his grip on her throat. She shot him a withering look.

"God hates you." KaraS snapped.

"Get out of here." Stevepalmer spat.

CoolSlider darted between two machines and disappeared.

HurriKain, HunterD_Raven, and Slider_Sarah had already faded and SpaceTime was just finishing weaving Jesikangel's still twitching body through and around the steering wheel of a driving game. CoolSlider raced past him and said, "let's ride!"

"Coming!"

She gave him an impish grin. "Let's just say that I'm glad you came along when you did. If we catch up to that punk again I want another crack at him."

Stevepalmer checked his blast gun charge. "Come on, we want to be there when they're caught."

HurriKain grinned. "Perfect place for our next ambush. I told Tigs to take her team there when she abandoned her Gate assignment."

"DMD has a unit there as well," SpaceTime offered between huffs of breath as he jogged. "It's our backup base of operations.

"This is going to be ugly." Slider_Sarah predicted.

ChiChi and BigNoseBob took the point. They passed within inches of Mychand, Tigs, SouthernSlider, Chaser9, and QBall79, who were hiding under throw rugs. In the darkness none of the invaders could see the bulges. ChiChi and BigNoseBob reached the other side of the main chamber and ran their hands along the wall to find the switch for the overhead lights.

The second Farscape team, ClaudiasLoveSlave and jolinar7, were in the middle now. JohnsKeedvaBBQ and itzAeryn were halfway along the wall on the left side while outtaluck76 and violettefrost held the same position on the right side. LateScaper, SunAeryn, and Mr_Majestic had the entrance.

"Ready with the lights." ChiChi reported.

"Teams ready to fire." LateScaper ordered. After a pause, he said, "lights!"

ChiChi flicked the switches and the lights flooded the chamber. The teams were tense and would have fired at the first sign of attackers. But there was no one lunging at them, and no one firing. Now that they were not moving themselves they could hear boots thudding down the corridor on the other side from the one they had emerged from.

"They must have just passed through without stopping." LateScaper remarked. "Come on-."

"Hey!" jolinar7 shouted. "These rugs have lumps!"

No sooner did he get that out before the rugs exploded upward. At the same time LateScaper happened to look up. HunterD_Raven was clinging to a hand grip in the wall. Even as the Slider fan released his grip and begen his descent, LateScaper realized that other enemies were clinging to the walls 20 feet from the floor all around the chamber.

Informant dropped down on outtaluck76, his hard boots crushing his opponents skull. He was off balance so he leaned towards violettefrost to throw off her aim.

Jenneration_X dropped next to itzAeryn, who saved his life by dodging aside at the last second, and began scuffling with him. His partner, JohnsKeedvaBBQ, was avoiding pulse fire from Grizzlor, who still clung to his hand grip, so the Farscaper could not help.

TheUnstuckSlider also stayed clinging to the wall, and his blast waves took out the two Scapers that HunterD_Raven was not fighting, SunAeryn, and Mr_Majestic.

ChiChi and BigNoseBob started to aim their weapons at the remaining wall huggers when they were jumped by CoolSlider, DieselMickeyDolenz and Slider_Sarah.

In the middle of the chamber, Mychand and SouthernSlider were holding jolinar7 while Tigs raked his stomach open with her long claws. ClaudiasLoveSlave had mortally wounded Qball79, but Chaser9 was in the process of vaporizing the unfortunate Farscaper.

HunterD_Raven pulled the light saber out of LateScaper. "I'll bet you wish you were an MST3K fan now, eh?" He asked the corpse.

There was a blast and HunterD_Raven's saber arm vanished. He looked behind him even as he pulled a derringer from his hip pocket.

"Drop whatever you have in the hand you have left." Stevepalmer ordered from the darkness of the corridor.

"You are one sneaky bastard." HunterD_Raven snarled. "Only cowards sneak around all the time."

"The key is to send other morons out first to take people's attention." Stevepalmer replied easily. HunterD_Raven made his move with his remaining hand and Stevepalmer gunned him down angrily. He supposed that no one else was going to be surrendering to him. Pity, he had big things planned for his next prisoner.

"Oh well," the Farscape leader sighed and aimed for the wall huggers. Grizzlor and TheUnstuckSlider both were easy targets and Stevepalmer took them out.

A blast from behind him melted the barrel of his blast gun. He and KaraS turned as one.

"I would just shoot you," SpaceTime commented. "But I want to feel your blood gushing down my arm." He tossed aside his pulse gun.

HurriKain was next to him. "I get the >:-#."

The four advanced on each other.

In the chamber behind them, Informant had finished off violettefrost and was making his way to the other side. On that side, itzAeryn, and JohnsKeedvaBBQ had dispatched Jenneration_X and were now engaged with Mychand, SouthernSlider, Tigs and Chaser9. On the far side ChiChi and BigNoseBob were still fighting CoolSlider, DieselMickeyDolenz and Slider_Sarah.

"Who could get three different boards to work together like this?" Murphy wanted to know as they jogged. He was beginning to understand the power structure a little now.

"I'll bet it's the Dominion." Blinker said between gasps for air. "They hated it when I started saving posts. They've been plotting to be rid of us for over a year now."

They rounded a corner and came face to face with a corridor block. The three Invisible Man members manning the post opened fire. Sliderlynn exploded when struck by two simultaneous blast waves. The group continued to run without even slowing. To stop would be certain death. A rocket from Blinker's backpack raced out and consumed fawkesieladyandEd. The other two, Fawkes_fan and squirrelbait, continued firing. BritSlider took a hit but charged on. MuleSlide took a pulse and a blast wave and fell against the wall, his running days over. darkslider took a hit as well, and then the group was at the barricade. BritSlider caved in squirrelbait's head, while capaqu blasted Fawkes_fan back to oblivion.

darkslider, leaking blood from a horrific stomach wound, lay down and rested his head on the floor. "Go on. I'll slow down your pursuers."

Blinker and BritSlider clasped his hand for a moment and then raced on, followed by capaqu and Murphy.

A minute later the pursuers followed cautiously. The leader, Ms_Boyd, plunged her rapier in MuleSlide's corpse. "There won't be any trickery here." She cackled. She lead them to the barricade and through the hole created by Blinker's rocket. "Here's another one." Ms_Boyd cried gleefully. She stuck the rapier deep into darkslider's thigh. When he didn't move she summoned the rest. "It's okay to pass." She slowly removed her weapon.

When Moze, True_Vincent_Lover, Invision, Dark_ Cleya, R2, liz_Z, and Kaat were passing by and all still close enough, darkslider suddenly activated his grenades. He had two seconds to cackle into their faces before the six tons of explosive crushed the life from all of them.

Ahead, Blinker whistled as he consulted his wrist camera, which had been tied into the corridor observation cameras. "Counting the three we took out, that makes 11 less Invisible Men to worry about, including their overall leader. 7:-P"

BritSlider was binding his chest wound as he ran. "I so don't have a problem with that."

"Must you dangle your participle?" SpaceTime replied, thrusting again. Then he answered the question. "We're tired of being walked on. You wouldn't understand that. You might, if your show is on the SF channel long enough."

Behind them, HurriKain had cornered KaraS in a corner. His lip was bleeding where she had wacked him a good one. It was the only shot of hers that had connected. She was holding him at bay with her dagger, and he was waiting for her to commit to a thrust so he could take it from her.

In the main chamber ChiChi and BigNoseBob were dead. Their vanquishers, CoolSlider, DieselMickeyDolenz and Slider_Sarah, were holding off First Wave reinforcements for now. It wouldn't last, there were too many of them. itzAeryn, and JohnsKeedvaBBQ had killed Mychand and SouthernSlider, but Tigs, Chaser9, and Informant had in turned killed them. The three survivors were binding their wounds. When they finished they relieved the three holding off the reinforcements so they could reload.

"If you have such an advantage, why are you trying to talk me into quitting?" SpaceTime asked Stevepalmer.

"I'm just getting tired of killing you people. I've had at least a dozen of you today. Brand_S is a buddy of yours, isn't he?"

SpaceTime's eyes were unreadable. "You killed Brand_S?"

Stevepalmer stabbed out again, danced to his left to avoid the counterthrust, and said, "Do you remember that old joke about the Challenger disaster? That Christa McAuliffe's eyes were blue. One blew this way, and the other blew that way. That was kinda what happened to your buddy after I hit him point blank with a blast gun. Is there anyone else you like? Maybe I killed them too."

SpaceTime was about to reply when Stevepalmer's right boot came down on a patch of blood. It slipped out from under him and he crashed to the floor. SpaceTime leapt forward and buried his knife into the other man's side.

At the moment, across the chamber, there was an explosion. Informant was consumed by a rocket. Behind the explosion they could hear quickly advancing troops.

CoolSlider, Chaser9, and DieselMickeyDolenz darted towards their escape hallway, a side corridor. Slider_Sarah grabbed Tigs and tugged her after them. "Come on you two! We're out of time!"

SpaceTime withdrew his blade and raced HurriKain out of the corridor and across the chamber. Stevepalmer gasped in pain as he rolled to his side and snatched a blast gun. He fired after the escaping Sliders. A chair exploded, followed by the TV against the wall, but the last two made it out. Stevepalmer slammed a palm on the floor in frustration as KaraS joined him. The First Wavers disgorged from the corridor across the chamber and raced after their quarry when pointed to the correct side corridor to take.

Blinker consulted his watch as he heated his can. "Well, some good news and some bad news."

BritSlider considered that. "Better give us the bad news first so we can end on an up note."

"The bad news is Lexx has declared war on us."

capaqu groaned. "Just what we need. More enemies."

"So what is the good news?" CoolSlider wanted to know.

"MST3K has invaded The Invisible Man domain in support of us. The Invisible Man fans have taken heavy losses here, including their war leader, and they have withdrawn from our borders to go back and repel their own invaders." Blinker added.

"So we're replacing a worn down enemy with a fresh enemy." BritSlider observed.

"Actually," capaqu argued, "the Lexx community is very close to The Invisible Man, I'll bet they help them first. It will be a while before we have to worry about them."

DieselMickeyDolenz spoke up. "We knew about what MST3K did. When we heard about that, we sent Slider_Sarah to Highlander to try and negotiate their entry into this fray, and we sent Tigs to Star Trek to try and do the same with them. Once they're done there the two are to proceed to other canceled show domains and try to garner sympathy there as well."

Murphy shook his head. "This is insane! The entire land fighting ... for what? Just for the sake of carnage?"

Blinker regarded the visitor impassively. "I suppose you think we should just lay in the middle of the corridor and wait for them to pass by and execute us. Once the fighting starts, the talking is over. We're beyond all that."

"They see us always fighting among ourselves and they thought that we wouldn't come together under duress." DieselMickeyDolenz added. "They didn't see that there is something that binds us which far outweighs any other differences. We are all Sliders fans. That means we know a pain greater than they anything they can inflict on our bodies. Anyone who hears the name 'Wade' and automatically thinks of a pretty little slip of a girl before anything else shares a bond that can never be broken, no matter how different they are otherwise."

"We have a new bond, too." CoolSlider added sardonically. "And that's Stevepalmer. If it is the last thing I ever do I'm going to see that punk burn. I don't even care anymore if I live or die as long as I live one more second than him."

Murphy sighed. "This soup is good."

"Isn't it?" Blinker replied, acknowledging Murphy's resignation from the argument with a wink.

The other First Wavers glanced around nervously. They were exploring the Hall Of Fame. Posts of old adorned the walls. The 30 foot wide chamber was scattered with kiosks upon which more posts were displayed. DrkAngel_113 and Caed had the point, redvenus and RAVENNATIONHQ brought up the rear.

MaryFX couldn't tell which direction the sound was coming from, or even what it was. So she finally ordered the group to began moving again. Within six footsteps she halted them again. "What IS that sound?"

"It sounded almost like ... water sloshing in a bucket." Caed remarked uncertainly.

MaryFX had a sudden horrible premonition. Her hand moved as if of its own volition and the flashbeam sprayed the floor. A dozen feet ahead of them something that was not water was running on the floor. "Retreat! It's a tra-."

Before she could finish her sentence a flare was lit further in the room and tossed into the running liquid. It ignited immediately and flames leaped six feet high in the air. The invaders turned and ran back the way they had come. A second flare was ignited and MaryFX realized too late that after they had passed, more gasoline has been poured behind them to seal them in. redvenus and RAVENNATIONHQ were within the second pool when it was lit and were consumed. MaryFX was on the border and she leaped back in time to save herself. She collided with Caed and knocked her blast rifle from her hands.

Pulse beams crashed in from the darkness between the twin sheets of hellish inferno. DrkAngel_113 was cut to pieces. MaryFX threw herself on the floor and crawled between two kiosks towards the gunmen. She heard Caed's mortal scream get suddenly cut off by a blast wave. She was alone now.

"I still hear a roach crawling." HurriKain called out.

slider75 chuckled. "I can see the roach. She is lit up beautifully against that fire."

"I surrender." MaryFX returned, tossing her rifle away from her dramatically and sitting up.

"We've heard how you treat your prisoners." HurriKain snapped. "FIRE."

eZeSlider and Slider_Quinn21 joined the other two in reducing her to a smoldering corpse.

HurriKain went over to her, kneeled, and lit a cigarette from her burning hair. "Come on guys. Our can o' whup ass is still quite full."

"These bastards are starting to really annoy me." Stevepalmer griped. He waved away the medical droid and tested the newly repaired flesh. "Good enough. Let's get back into the hunt." He studied the map. "According to this, we've lost people to recent ambushes here, here, here, and here. First Wave has lost people here, here and here. These areas have not been explored yet. The problem is that we've been wasting resources going to places where ambushes have already taken place. They're long gone and have been continuously moving. So they're always going to new places to ambush us again. So what we do is look for a place where they haven't hit us yet and pour everything there. There's a good chance we'll catch a lot of them that way."

"Excellent plan, sir." KaraS cooed. "But that would only work if we send in a unit the usual size first. Let them get smoked, and then crash in on the ambushers. So far we have been divided and searching everywhere at once, so they won't be expecting that."

"Agreed. The First Wavers are leaderless now that MaryFX is dead. So they're taking orders from me. I'll send them in first. We'll follow behind and crush the Slider fans."

"So where do we try this?"

Stevepalmer grinned and pointed at the JOC Fanatics wing. "There."

sisyphus417 halted them at the elaborate Colin shrine. "This is disturbing."

They moved on, towards a massive fountain dominating the garden in the center of the wing. A gigantic statue of Jerry held a barrel over his head, from which poured a stream of water. Unfortunately, Jerry was not wearing a shirt.

"Very disturbing," Mahaloth added.

They fanned out, three going on side of the fountain, the other two taking the other side. Their backs were to the fountain as they scanned the darkened wing with their flashbeams. None of them had checked the fountain pool itself.

Four shapes rose slowly, quietly from the water. TemporalFlux, RMScream, Chaser9, and Slider75 softly spat out their air hoses and aimed their crossbows. HurriKain poked his head out of the barrel Jerry was holding and aimed his blast rifle.

A sudden flurry of bow strings, the soft whisper of bolts ripping through the air, and then the silence was broken by screams of pain. true5 and ElHombreX were not hit and they ran back the way they had come. HurriKain picked them off easily.

eZeSlider and Slider_Quinn21 emerged behind from nearby stacks of fan fiction. ">:-#, this is getting embarrassing. We haven't even been wounded the last three engagements."

HurriKain dangled from the barrel, then dropped into the pool below. "I'm not complaining about that."

eZeSlider was about to reply that he hadn't been complaining when the top half of his head vanished. Everyone but him heard the distinctive sounds of the blast wave.

"Take cover!" RMScream screamed as he leapt from the pool.

More shots rang out. slider75 was cut down before he could escape the pool. Slider_Quinn21 hit the floor and crawled to the nearest stack of fan fiction. KaraS was already there. "Hi!" She greeted brightly before she jumped on his back, pulled his chin up, and slit his throat.

The Scapers charged before the Sliders could secure themselves in their cover and start returning fire. HurriKain managed to drop one enemy before 30d954A reached him and engaged him.

Scorpwanna and Lassievorc reached RMScream and tried to wrestle him to the floor so they could gut him. Chaser9 charged from his hiding spot and tackled Scorpwanna. RMScream twisted Lassievorc's arm behind his back and smashed his head to the floor. A vicious head twist finished the Farscaper. He turned to the other two to find that Chaser9 was cleaning his blade on his enemy's tunic.

Sorlk_Lewis had approached them while they wrestled with their opponents. Now that he didn't have to worry about hitting a comrade, he opened fire with his laser rifle. RMScream was hit twice and fell face first on the floor. Chaser9 scrambled for his blast gun but never came close to raising it before he was also gunned down.

Five minutes later HurriKain and TemporalFlux were brought before Stevepalmer. "We lost Scarlettinaxs and 30d954A taking these two, but we have them."

Stevepalmer grinned happily. "Temp! How are you, man? What does it feel like to see all you have ever cherished on the verge of total destruction?"

">:-# you." TemporalFlux spat.

Stevepalmer nodded to KaraS. She left and returned in a minute dragging a large cooking pot. Another Scaper put down a heating element and helped KaraS set the pot on it. A third carried something up and placed it in the pot. Within a minute an acrid stench began emanating from the pot.

"While we let that simmer, I'll talk with you, HurriKain." Stevepalmer walked to face the other prisoner.

"What is this to you? Why are you so 'all in' about this?" HurriKain asked curiously.

Stevepalmer seemed taken aback. "Well, it's nothing personal. I just give a 100% to whatever I do. I feel like if anything is worth doing, it is worth doing with everything I have. I don't do things halfway. Some people say I indulge in overkill, but I don't know any other way to do things. The task before me is to eradicate all of you. I will succeed because I'll outwork all of you. If you outwork your opponent that gives you a huge advantage."

HurriKain had latched onto the first thing he'd said. "Nothing personal? What is more personal than killing someone? It doesn't matter what the reason is, it doesn't get any more personal than that."

Stevepalmer snorted. "You're speaking in overblown terms. NOTHING is more personal? What about sex? That is the most intimate activity."

"Not true. People in general average five sexual partners within their lifetimes. Some a lot less, some a whole lot more, but that is the average. But if someone kills you, that will be the only person to kill you. Obviously. Only one person will end your life. And before you start talking about multiple assailants, A hundred people could stab you, but only one of the knife thrusts would be the one that actually killed you. No, that is far more personal."

Stevepalmer, unsettled, turned away from HurriKain. "Ah, the pot is hot enough." He walked back to TemporalFlux. "I placed in here several diskettes containing everything you have ever written on the Sliders board. They are now nicely melted plastic and other nasty materials. Not very palatable, but they are your words. How fitting that you should eat your own words." He nodded and Chryse74 and DaWombat lifted the pot with gloved hands and brought it to TemporalFlux. KaraS held his head and forced his mouth to open by digging her fingers into the pressure points beneath his jaw hinges. The steaming, boiling plastic poured into his mouth and down his throat. TemporalFlux was released and he fell to his knees, gagging and choking. Stevepalmer watched him suffocate before returning his attention to HurriKain.

"You intrigue me. I'll save you for last. Bring him along."

"Jesus Christ." capaqu gasped. "That's IT?"

"According to the mainframe." Blinker sighed. "While we slept we took heavy losses at the JOC wing. Stevepalmer again. He has led attacks resulting in 40 casualties. That's triple the next person, who was MaryFX and she is dead now."

"If it's the last thing I do," CoolSlider snapped, "I'm getting that punk."

"Join the crowd." SpaceTime growled.

"It seems like all of this could have been avoided." Murphy ventured. "Before you ask, no, I don't know how. I guess I am just overwhelmed at all this senseless death."

"How did this weenie get mixed up with you guys?" Stoker_chick wanted to know.

Murphy regarded her with awe. He'd obviously never seen a warrior princess before. "I just woke up here. I have no clue how I got here."

"Have you ever watched Sliders?" SpaceTime inquired.

"I love the show!" Murphy exclaimed. "But I don't know how I ended up here."

"All Sliders fans eventually pass through this way." BritSlider observed. "Misery loves company. And there is nothing more miserable than being a Sliders fan."

"But Sliders fans love the show! What do you mean misery?"

BritSlider laughed and fought to urge to ruffle Murphy's hair. "You've obviously never been in love with a woman before. If you had you'd know the two feelings are intertwined."

"Getting back to the our current situation, where do we go from here?" capaqu wanted to know.

BritSlider, Blinker, SpaceTime, and Stoker_chick exchanged a knowing glance.

"What?" Murphy pressed.

SpaceTime finally spoke. "It's time to turn out the lights."

CoolSlider grinned as understanding welled up in him. He thought of the many fallen Sliders fans. "Oh. Yes. I'm on board for THAT."

"How is that going to change anything?" KaraS questioned.

The Farscape leader removed a blast gun power cell from his belt and placed it on corridor floor. Motioning everyone away, he grabbed a nearby cinder block. From a distance of six feet he tossed the cinder block on the power cell. There was a small explosion and the cinder block vanished without a trace.

"Now imagine that was the fusion reactor that powers this entire domain."

KaraS made an O with her mouth. "We'd have nothing to return to the Dominion except radioactive dust."

Stevepalmer nodded. "Put all of our best people in the corridors leading to the reactor. Including us. Barricades, mounted blast guns, the works."

The last First Wave unit had the first barricade, and they were caught flat footed as they had been trying to install a mounted blast gun. LoriP1010, HollyC, Ishtar, and scifime2 dove for their weapons.

DieselMickeyDolenz, and cc_deville had point and they gunned down two of the First Wavers before they could even lift their weapons. Ishtar died next after one wild shot, and HollyC died after mortally wounding sliderules.

The rest ran on. The second barricade was forewarned, and they fired with devastating efficiency from behind sandbags.

cc_deville, PHOENIXZERO, VirtualDimension, and capaqu were cut down before the rest reached and leaped over the sandbags. Stoker_chick and Sabre_Edge were wounded and on the floor behind them, out of the action for the moment.

The_Grand_Wazoo, queeneve, SebaceanGrunt, and AtEase were behind the barricade. The_Grand_Wazoo impaled DieselMickeyDolenz with his bayonet and forced him to the ground. Before he could sink the blade in any deeper, BritSlider was over the barricades and clubbing him with the butt of his Enfield L85A1. When The_Grand_Wazoo fell back, BritSlider finished him off with several rounds. BritSlider checked DieselMickeyDolenz but the fallen Slider fan was beyond help. The same could be said for the other three Farscapers. Alternity_Orange and Vigeant had also paid with their lives, but the final barricade had been cleared.

SpaceTime, Blinker, BritSlider, and Murphy headed towards the south reactor door, which was only a hundred feet away.

"Never underestimate the power of homicidal rage." SpaceTime remarked, his hatchet still clenched in one fist.

The others were looking warily around for hidden doors containing more guards, even though they knew the forces had to be spread thin to watch all four doors since gun fire could not be risked inside the reactor room itself. So Murphy was the only one who noticed that the floor changed color slightly ten feet from the door. "Guys, why is this part of the floor looking so much newer?"

Before anyone could react, the floor buzzed and an electric charge zapped the four Slider fans. Only Blinker was not rendered unconscious. He looked down gratefully at his shielded boots and then blasted open the door with his last rocket.

The reactor control was 30 feet from the door. He scanned the room, didn't see any guards, and rushed towards the control.

An energy weapon fired inside the reactor room could accomplish exactly what Blinker was trying to do. It was not guaranteed, but the risk was too great. So KaraS, safely perched on a ceiling crossbeam 20 feet above the floor, was armed with a crossbow. She aimed carefully and hit Blinker through the left arm with her first shot. Her second nailed his left leg to the floor. He twisted around and fired his blast gun. The blast wave did not ignite the reactor, and nor did it come close to hitting KaraS. She shot a bolt through his gun wrist. The blast gun hit the floor and skittered out of Blinker's reach. He tugged at his leg with all his might, freed the bolt through his leg from the floor, and began crawling towards the control panel. KaraS missed him with her next shot, then nicked his other leg.

Blinker crawled on determinedly.

Three bolts later Blinker's bloody hand dropped to the floor for the final time, six inches from where the control panel met the floor.

Stevepalmer was lounging in a recliner someone had dragged from one of the rooms. "Ah, the stimulant is taking effect. I would have let you sleep longer, but I am eager to finish this business and get back to my own domain."

None of them said anything.

Stevepalmer seemed disappointed. He waved to unohoo. "Maybe this will cheer you up."

The Farscaper led out two handcuffed, battered people. Slider_Sarah and Tigs.

"The emissaries you dispatched did not make it past our patrols. Your defeat is complete. Everyone is present and accounted for. I even left the corridor barricades up and my best person in the reactor room, in case we missed anyone. But we didn't. You are all who remain."

"Well boggie boggie for you." SpaceTime snapped.

Stevepalmer grinned. "Yes, I think I'll start with you." He rose and walked behind SpaceTime and the others sitting on that side of the picnic table. "You're supposed to be a flame god around here, right? Well, in my domain it is I who is a flame god." They could hear him fiddling with something behind them. There was a slight but brief hissing sound. "I think Neil Gaiman said it best, Mr. Time. He said that the greatest thing that could happen to a person was to be personally killed by a god. It means that the person became part of a god's design. Far from being a tragedy, it is actually a wondrous thing to have a god personally end your life. Are you ready for the wondrous, SpaceTime?"

SpaceTime's head was suddenly seized in a strong grip and forced backwards. A gas mask was placed on his mouth and nose and secured. The prisoner held his breath as long as he could, then his chest heaved and he took in two lungs full of kerosene vapor. Stevepalmer ripped the mask off and shoved a lit long match in it's place, right against SpaceTime's lips.

As the gases ignited, SpaceTime suddenly turned in the Farscaper's loose grasp and expelled the combusting air in Stevepalmer's direction. Perhaps Stevepalmer had been expecting something like this. Or perhaps he just had the luck of the devil. In any case he darted to his left at the first sign of his victim turning and the six foot long blast missed the Farscape leader.

Stevepalmer stepped back into SpaceTime's field of vision as the flaming breath died out and gestured dramatically in the universal magician's "presto" signal. This sarcastic gesture was the last thing SpaceTime saw before he collapsed, his lungs burning from inside out.

"So who is next?" Stevepalmer asked the rest of them. "Any other smart >:-#-ed comments? You might as well, actually. I'm going to kill you anyway. Everyone has to die, it is my task."

His eyes fell on Murphy. "Except for you. You are not a part of this. Release him."

Murphy swallowed audibly. "These people are my friends. I am not abandoning them."

BritSlider glared at Murphy. "Murphy! Get your >:-# up and leave! There's no reason for you to die with us!"

"I'm not going anywhere."

Stevepalmer seemed amused. "What if I do to you what I did to SpaceTime?"

"I wouldn't miss when I spat out the fire at you." Murphy returned, trying to keep his lip from trembling.

For a long moment the silence in the courtyard was deafening. Then Stevepalmer said, "I can see what they see in you."

The charge had not been a total diversion to allow him to make it. There had been some hope the frontal attack would work simply because they could concentrate on one door, where the defenders had to cover all four equally strongly.

Obviously the frontal assault had not worked or he wouldn't still be alive. Now he was at the final screen before the water was sucked up through six inch pipes to where it would be processed. At each filter was an access door to the floor above so the screens could be serviced and changed when necessary. CoolSlider shot the lock on this final trapdoor and the door fell open. Far above he could see the roof of the reactor room. As he'd been told, the final access panel was within the room itself. The enemy would have been expecting some effort against the reactor room. If none had surfaced, they would have thought of these access panels.

CoolSlider poked his head cautiously out of the panel. Apparently the frontal assault had been convincing enough to relax the Farscapers, because there was no guard he could see. He tossed his pulse gun out first and then lifted himself out of the waterpipe. When he looked towards the control panel, he realized how convincing the attack had been. Blinker's corpse was cooling mere inches from the panel. It had been that close.

Dripping the water noisily, CoolSlider headed for the reactor control panel.

KaraS woke with a start when the access panel was shot open. She had been dozing on her perch above the reactor room. It had been a long 24 hours since the invasion had begun and she had slept little of that time. After the frontal assault she had waited intently for something else to happen for an hour before her eyes began to droop. Finally, after ensuring her straps had her secure on the beam, KaraS had rested her head on a vertical beam and dozed.

Someone was in the reactor room. She raised her crossbow and wiped her eyes with her free sleeve.

"Why are you dragging this out?" HurriKain wanted to know. "I thought this was just a job. There was a reason to be a sadistic bastard when you were waging war. War is mostly psychological, and you have a tremendous advantage if you can psych out your opponent."

"I know that's what you were doing with your bizarre executions." Sabre_Edge added. "You knew Blinker was tied into the main computer and could call up records of all the deaths. We would all know how your prisoners died."

"That made sense then. But why are you doing it now?" HurriKain finished.

Stevepalmer grinned. "You have such easy explanations for my atrocities. What if it was much more complex than that?"

"I don't care what your reasons are." Someone said.

Stevepalmer faced the newcomer. It was the Summoner in the long brown robe.

"Finish them, now. As long as one of them occupies this land the Reboot will include them. Finish them now, we have less than an hour." The Dominion emissary ordered.

Stevepalmer sighed. "You made us do this! Don't you start ordering the best way to go about it! I'll do whatever the >:-# I want to do!"

BritSlider exchanged a grin with HurriKain, as if to say "this ought to be good."

Sabre_Edge spoke up. "Are you going to let him talk to you that way, Robe Boy?"

KaraS reloaded hurriedly and fired again. CoolSlider took this bolt in his neck. It didn't puncture an artery but he had no doubt he couldn't afford to give her another chance.

There! He could barely see her in the darkness but he detected her reloading again. CoolSlider emptied his pulse gun into that region and was elated to hear her cry out.

The force of the pulse bursts knocked her off her perch. The straps held and she dangled beneath the beam, her crossbow falling to the floor below her with a loud clatter. She couldn't feel the right side of her body, and her left arm had been hit as well. KaraS hung helplessly, swinging back and forth, futilely watching CoolSlider get to his feet with effort.

The Slider Fan activated a flash beam and illuminated her. Her wounds were obvious, as was the helplessness on her face. CoolSlider spoke with effort. "Stay there like a good girl. My atoms will be joining yours in mere moments." The bolt in his neck made him sound like he was speaking from under water.

CoolSlider turned to the panel.

"I resent being used in this way. In fact, I cancel our arrangement." Stevepalmer fired repeatedly into the robe.

The blast waves riddled the robe. The shredding cloth flew away in scattering pieces and floated to the floor. The being it covered was like something out of a Bill Gates CRACK nightmare. Its skin was a luminescent silver. Its many crisscrossing veins glowed green and a sickly yellow through the filament thin skin. Its head was squat, hairless, and lumpy. Four machine blue eyes gleamed with madness. Its mouth was a small ragged hole filled with microchip teeth that chattered and clicked together like someone with the shakes holding a bag of dominoes. Its lower jaw jumped and twitched convulsively, creating the nerve wracking sound.

The creature lifted one three taloned hand and stroked the air.

Stevepalmer's expression turned to horror as his tunic began to flow from his body in watery streams. His skin followed. The streams flowed towards the circle of air the creature caressed. The others could tell Stevepalmer was trying to turn, to move, to run, but his body never moved as it began to liquefy and flow towards the Dominion emissary. After the skin the muscles and then the skeleton dissolved and flowed towards the creature, disappearing an inch from the writhing fingers.

After five horrible minutes, the only thing remaining of Stevepalmer was his boots and his discarded blast gun.

The creature eyed the closest Farscaper, janra2. "Shoot them all. Don't make me tell you again."

CoolSlider turned around and slid to the floor with his back against the panel. He summoned the energy to say to KaraS, "if you have any last words, I suggest you say them now."

KaraS, fighting the pain of her own wounds, thought but her mind was blank. Finally, she said, "your show sucks."

CoolSlider chuckled despite the pain it caused his neck. "I wish I could say the same about yours but I've never been able to force myself to watch it."

"Reactors are overloading." The computer reported tonelessly.

"Computer?" CoolSlider replied.

"Yes? Do you want me to power down?" It asked.

"Don't anticipate my commands, it is very annoying."

"Sorry." The computer apologized.

"If you have any Blue Oyster Cult, you can put it on?"

The computer paused, then said, "I have just the thing. I was given this song for just such emergencies like this."

As the reactor room filled with the infamous guitar opening, CoolSlider closed his eyes and smiled.

The room winked out of existence 30 seconds later.

The picnic table, his companions, his handcuffs, even his blue tunic ... all vanished. Murphy fell on his naked butt to the floor. He raised himself on his knees and looked around. The floor and distant walls glowed a dull yellow and stretched as far as he could see in both directions. The surfaces were crisscrossed with light blue lines, creating thousands of small symmetrical rectangles.

Only the Dominion creature remained. Everyone and everything else was gone.

The creature sighed an expletive and turned to go.

"Wait! What is this all about?" Murphy called out.

The creature glared back at him. "Why don't you sign up and become a member? Just remember, we're not accepting web based e-mail addresses at this time."

"That's it? That's all you have to say?!" Murphy demanded.

The creature kept walking and soon was a tiny dot in the distance. Soon after that even the dot was gone.

Murphy got to his feet and walked after it. Soon he reached what might have been the exact center of this vast chamber. 12 foot long red digital letters counted up. 11:45:45. 11:45:46. 11:45:47. Murphy wondered how high the numbers went, and then the similarity to a digital clock occurred to him. He sat next to the numbers and watched the counting.

The closer it got to 12:00:00 the more drowsy he got. By 11:55:00 he couldn't sit up any longer. He lay with his head turned so he could see the numbers. By 11:58:50 he could no longer keep his eyes open, but he could see the numbers in his mind.

11:59:20

11:59:35

11:59:4-

Murphy slept...

Over here SL4ever was grilling chicken with half a dozen other people, including BritSlider, Spaz, MTwain, HurriKain, and CoolSlider. Stevepalmer and KaraS were playing pinochle at a picnic table with HunterD_Raven and Stoker_chick. As he looked, Stevepalmer said something that made everyone laugh.

Murphy shook his head and looked around again, but nothing had changed.

"Glad you could finally rejoin us, Murphy."

Murphy turned so quickly he hurt his neck. It was Blinker, sitting near him polishing something white that he was holding with his hand. "But ... but everyone was dead. I saw it!"

"We're Sliders Fans. We've died a thousand deaths, what's one more?" Blinker said enigmatically.

Murphy got to his feet. "That's not good enough this time. I demand answers."

Blinker continued polishing with vigor, pausing only to inspect his work before polishing some more. "Violence is rarely permanent, Murphy. Especially verbal violence, which is all that is possible here. Only people who allow it to stay with them and thus give it power over them can be harmed by words."

"I don't want silly morals of the story, I want smegging ANSWERS before I get violent!"

Blinker set aside what he had been polishing. "CoolSlider destroyed the domain, forcing a reboot before midnight. The only way the Dominion can take over this domain is if there is no longer a single Sliders fan living in here on the midnight of the day of their quarterly cleaning deadline. That's when they come through and clean out all the old posts and close down the no longer used topics. They wanted to wipe us all out so they could take over this memory hogging community. They try something every three months but we always find a way to outwit them. There were still people alive when CoolSlider forced the reboot, so everything was reset."

Murphy's arms dropped. "Okay, that makes a little sense. But how can everyone just act like nothing happened? They are laughing and joking despite the horrible things that happened yesterday. They should be ripping Stevepalmer's head from his neck and instead they're playing cards with him!"

Blinker held up the object he had been polishing. "We can't keep calling you 'Murphy.' What kind of name is that? Here, I have something for you."

Murphy accepted what Blinker offered. It was a skullcap. The toothy mouth seemed to be open in an eternal, silent scream. Without hesitation he placed it upon his head. A name tag appeared on his blue tunic.

"Yes," Sliding_Skull intoned. "Yes. I understand now. It's suddenly very clear."