Quinn: Oh my God! It's my double!

Jerry: Oh my gawd! It's my dietitian! No, sir, of course I wasn't gonna eat these twinkies, they're for Charlie, I swear it!

Quinn: I'm not your dietitian.

Jerry: Thank God! (Shoves twinkie in his mouth)

Quinn: I'm your double from another dimension!

Jerry laughs, and spits all over Quinn.

Jerry: HAHAHAHAHA! Yeah right!

Quinn: I swear I am!

Jerry: C'mon, drop the act, Sliders got canceled years ago! But I don't blame the cast. Or the producers. I blame the fact that I wasn't-

Quinn: I don't care who you blame!!

Jerry: Yes you do!

Quinn: No I don't!

Jerry: Yes you do!

Quinn: No I don't!

This continues for the next half an hour.

Quinn: Trust me man, I don't care!!

Jerry: OK, OK... (pauses thoughtfully) What were we talking about again?

Quinn: AGH!!!! This is by far my stupidest double ever!! Even worse than that goddamn clone!!

Jerry: Oh yeah, I hated playing him.

Suddenly, Quinn shouts out.

Quinn: AHHH! Goddamn it! It must be 10:00! Where's that slut Maggie when ya need her!

Jerry: Yeah, where are those guys, anyways?

Quinn: I disposed of them a while ago. Arturo I shot when he was starting to get smarter than me, I gave Wade to the Kromaggs when I got Maggie, I gave Maggie an STD, and I lost Remmy somewhere, somehow. He was a drag, anyway.

Jerry: ...oh.

(a long awkward pause)

Quinn: So on this world, we're just a TV show?

Jerry: Yup, a crappy one at that. It got canceled more times than I got laid! But I don't blame the cast, or the producers, or Peckinpah, even. I blame the fact that I-

Quinn: That would explain a lotta things. Like that strange voice that kept saying "sliders" in my sleep...

Jerry: Oh, that was Bill. great guy. He had a really huge-

Quinn: NO!! NO NO NO NO! I'm straight man.

Jerry: I know, straight as a board- oh you mean, you're not gay. Huh, I could've sworn I played you as gay as I could possibly act. Not that I'm gay, or anything-

Quinn: Well, you obviously aren't that good an actor.

Jerry: NOW YOU TAKE THAT BACK!!!

Quinn: Well, how many acting jobs have you had?

Jerry: A couple, I manage to keep a reputation as an actor without actually acting all that much. I'm in a new movie coming out soon called "Buying the Cow".

Quinn: HA HA! You have to buy yours? I get a new one every week for free!

Sarah Michelle Geller walks by.

Quinn: ...and there she is now! (gets up to go)

Jerry: Hey! what're you doing?

Quinn: I'm gonna slam her into an oncoming car, than take her to the hospital pretending it was an accident, and when she's in a coma, I'll sleep with her!

Jerry: Already been done. Just go up to her, and ask her for her number.

Quinn: OK, I'll try it your way.

(Quinn does, and she kicks his ass all over the concrete)

Sarah: STOP ASKIN JERK-OFF!

(Quinn limps back to a hysteric Jerry)

Quinn: Wha-wha-wha-what was th-th-th-that f-f-f-f-f-for?

Jerry: HAHAHA I've been bribing her to go out with me for the last four years!! I get that all the time!!!

Quinn: You bastard!

(Quinn's zipper breaks)

Quinn: Holy hell! I need a cow, and I need one now!!

Jerry: OK OK OK, since were made of the same genetic material, I'm gonna help you out. Here are the names, addresses, and phone numbers of all the female cast members ever on the show. (he pulls out very thick little black book) Take your pick!

Quinn: Thanks man, you saved my pants from exploding! (flipping through book) Heather Hanley...

Jerry: Good choice! She's already in my bedroom! In fact, I had her built into my wall next to Logan St. Clair. When's the slide? Whoa, hasn't said that in a while.

(Quinn pulls out timer)

Quinn: OH NO! 10 seconds!!

Jerry: HA HA HA !!!

Jerry grabs the timer away, and opens up the vortex.

Jerry: Bye byes!

Still holding the timer, Jerry shoves Quinn in, and the vortex closes.

Jerry: Like I'd ever let you have Heather Hanley…